Ontologenesis » Me

Hail the Victorious Dead

ZSDP — Thu, 17 Dec 2009 03:43:01 +0000

A few days ago, Graham Harman suggested listing those one considers to be the 20 greatest Western philosophers of all time. I think such lists would prove to be very interesting, if we could get a number of people to make them, because the relatively small number of slots would force us to make choices and assessments that are in all likelihood very telling of our personal and philosophical quirks. In fact, stating a methodology for choosing would surely be provocative, even without a list. The list itself, however, can be fun to make—and even more fun to read.

I will be making two lists. The first will be my nominees for the 20 Greatest Western Philosophers of All Time, with a brief explanation of the rationale for my choices following the list. My second list will simply include 10 authors I absolutely loathe, which I think is rather self-explanatory (and probably totally unsurprising for those of you who follow my Twitter-based ravings). I hope you enjoy them both, and I’d be interested in your comments (and lists) should you be so kind as to provide them.

The 20 Greatest Western Philosophers Of All Time (Up To This Point In Time, Of Course, After Which All Bets Are Off)

Aquinas, Thomas
Bacon, Francis
Bergson, Henri
Deleuze, Gilles
Eriugena, John Scotus
Freud, Sigmund
Heidegger, Martin
Hume, David
Kant, Immanuel
Leibniz, Gottfried Wilhelm von
Maximos the Confessor, St.
Nietzsche, Friedrich Wilhelm
Plato
Pseudo-Dionysios
Sartre, Jean-Paul
Saussure, Ferdinand de
Schelling, Friedrich Wilhelm Joseph
Spinoza, Baruch
Suarez, Francisco
Uexküll, Jakob Johann von

Now, I’m certain that this list is going to garner a number of what-the-hell-is-wrong-with-you-type comments, so let me make something very clear. This list is comprised of those I consider to be the best Western philosophers, those whose ideas I feel have had and continue to have the greatest fecundity—it is not isomorphic with a list of those that history has graced with the greatest fame and influence. If I were to make that list, it would pretty obviously require the addition of people like Aristotle, Descartes, and Hegel, all of whom I have omitted. Go retake your undergraduate history of philosophy courses if you really need the comfort of that list.

Of course, there are a couple of other potential problems with this list. First, my criteria for choosing might lead you to believe that I simply chose my favorite philosophers. I assure you this is not the case—that, in fact, I strongly dislike about 25% of the philosophers on this list—but you will simply have to take my word for it. Second, there are more than a few on the list whose statuses as philosophers is arguable, to say the least. “Surely”, you might say, “you realize that Freud was a neurologist? Saussure a linguist?” Yes, yes, I know. However, each had some distinctly philosophical ideas that are extremely powerful, with ramifications that extend throughout all of philosophy’s many sub-disciplines.

If the above list didn’t piss you off, I’m sure this next one will:

10 Pricks Who’ve Needlessly Cocked Up Philosophy For Everyone Else

Anselm of Canterbury
Augustine of Hippo, Saint
Berkeley, George
Chisholm, Roderick
Descartes, René
Hegel, Georg Wilhelm Friedrich
Hobbes, Thomas
Pascal, Blaise
Rand, Ayn
Russell, Bertrand

You may notice that this list is not exactly the polar opposite of the one above. After all, who could say that Hegel’s fruit aren’t ripe for plucking (and making into a pie)? Most of these authors have had some great historical impact (e.g. Augustine, Descartes) or are considered to be important as contemporary figures (e.g. Chisholm), though some definitely have neither point in their favor (I’m talking about you Rand). For one reason or another, I believe that these authors’ ideas are either just particularly egregious on their own or have led others off the clear path and into a dark forest.

I hope this was enjoyable for you all. And by the way, in my book, Timaeus is the greatest Platonic dialogue.

“If wishes were horses . . .”

ZSDP — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 22:18:03 +0000

This post is kind of embarrassing. My wife assures me that it isn’t wrong, though, so I’m going to go ahead and do it.

My 21st birthday is coming up in about a week and a half (10 days, in fact), and I am poor as dirt. If you love me—or if you would simply like to assuage my pitiful ignorance—please consider sending me one of the 21 books on my Amazon Wishlist. It would definitely brighten my year.

Thanks.

Too Much Information

ZSDP — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 08:25:24 +0000

Playing the part of vivisectionist is natural, I suppose, up to a certain point in a student’s life. The excuse is readymade and placed in our hands—force-fed to us, really—”You are yet too ignorant to bring aught to birth! Sit at your master’s feet, learn his doctrines, and then perhaps you will be fertile.” We are instructed to slice into yet another amphibious specimen, to quell our ignorance with the alchemical juices of its innards. Gathering them, we will one day enact the Magnum Opus. But until then, ignorance, whether real or imagined, paralyzes the faculties, rendering stillborn those fruits we have managed to bring forth by paroxysmal labors. Exhausted, we lapse into sloth.
It’s rather obvious that I’ve fallen to this disease. Four posts over the course of nearly three months—this post being the fifth? Pathetic. Too much goes on in my head to excuse this authorial stinginess. At the very least, I should be able to provide some comments on the veritable deluge of books and articles I swallow whole on a regular basis. What is most needful of all, however, is to enter conversation. I have hidden behind the curtain, partaking voyeuristically of the intellectual intercourse when I ought to add my seed. Today, I cast off my robe, this fear of ignorance. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?

A New Beginning

ZSDP — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 08:21:01 +0000

Well, I’ve finally gotten my act together with this website. It isn’t completely finished, obviously—I still need to write a couple of sample syllabi and fill out the course pages. On the whole, however, it is fairly presentable.

All day Thursday (do I call it today or tomorrow? it’s really late—or early), I will be completing these final items in preparation for a curriculum fair being held on Friday, at which I will be advertising my courses. I expect that Writing Composition and the History of Christianity will be the most popular courses, but I do hope that I get enough students to do at least one of the fun philosophy or literature classes. Beggars can’t be choosers, though!

Also, I mean to start blogging here somewhat regularly, even though I already write (sparsely) at l’infini et le neant. I feel a kind of tug away from that project, mostly because I feel the need to air my eccentricities in a place that is uniquely my own. I don’t plan on ceasing my activity there, however, until my co-contributor is annexed to The Well of Questions, at which time l’infini et le neant will fade into irrelevance—and we certainly won’t need to be writing together on two separate blogs. This place will be uniquely my own when that happens. I hope to make it home.

For now, I need rest. Buona notte, amici.